i understand if you need space and i don't blame you if we can't talk for a little while but i needed to tell you that i'm still here if you ...need or want is. like. assuming? you know what i mean just be careful ok?
oh ...do you want to try words? or do you want to leave it and we pretend we had a good talk about it and let the dust settle until you're ready to do something else?
[he can't see it, but this is the first thing to make her laugh all evening.
she'll try words.]
like its like reading the same story over and over again and expecting there to be a different ending THIS time if you read hard enough
once upon a time there was a someone, but they weren't a someone they were evil and everyone knew they were evil and there was no changing it and so they just leaned into it and eventually they believed their own bullshit and you wonder if anybody ever understood, would it be different but even when you have that understanding it doesn't matter because it's inside you now it's rotted
you're just rotted. and there's no fixing it. so you just enjoy it. you kill someone because you can and it doesn't even feel bad, you just think it's funny that you got caught and that's always the ending, and it's the ending i can see.
[ he doesn't reply immediately because this sounds very eerily similar to the last conversation he had with mika and it spooks him a little how much he does, actually understand this. ]
does it make you feel stupid to have wanted to see someone like him have a different ending because you wanted it for him? or because it would mean maybe there's one for you, too?
just because his story ended this way doesn't mean yours will you're still different
[ and then, a few seconds later: ]
left some stuff for you outside of the suite whenever you're ready
[ if she does ever decide to open the door, she will find a little folded stack. it kind of looks like a pink hoodie he grabbed from somewhere, a package of oreoes, some kind of soda, a few apples, and some standard toiletries because he figures she's going to hole up somewhere for a while. she will also find he is not there. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
w1 saturday
and i don't blame you if we can't talk for a little while
but i needed to tell you that i'm still here if you
...need or want is. like. assuming?
you know what i mean
just be careful ok?
no subject
i'm not angry at you nico
i know he's a psycho
no subject
but?
[ he feels like he hears a "but" in that sentence. ]
no subject
i don't think i can really explain how i feel in words
i guess stupid
no subject
...do you want to try words?
or do you want to leave it and we pretend we had a good talk about it and let the dust settle until you're ready to do something else?
no subject
she'll try words.]
like
its like
reading the same story over and over again
and expecting there to be a different ending THIS time if you read hard enough
once upon a time there was a someone, but they weren't a someone
they were evil and everyone knew they were evil and there was no changing it and so they just leaned into it and eventually they believed their own bullshit
and you wonder if anybody ever understood, would it be different but
even when you have that understanding it doesn't matter because it's inside you now
it's rotted
you're just rotted. and there's no fixing it. so you just enjoy it. you kill someone because you can and it doesn't even feel bad, you just think it's funny that you got caught
and that's always the ending, and it's the ending i can see.
no subject
does it make you feel stupid to have wanted to see someone like him have a different ending because you wanted it for him?
or because it would mean maybe there's one for you, too?
no subject
but i don't know if there is a different ending for me
no subject
to satisfy your own curiosity?
no subject
not yet
[it's the yet she's scared of.]
no subject
[ it's the yet he's clinging to. ]
no subject
[it's really all she can say.]
no subject
just because his story ended this way doesn't mean yours will
you're still different
[ and then, a few seconds later: ]
left some stuff for you outside of the suite whenever you're ready
[ if she does ever decide to open the door, she will find a little folded stack. it kind of looks like a pink hoodie he grabbed from somewhere, a package of oreoes, some kind of soda, a few apples, and some standard toiletries because he figures she's going to hole up somewhere for a while. she will also find he is not there. ]
no subject
he gets a message later that's just:]
t hank you
no subject
you know how to find me when you want to
[ whether that's tonight, tomorrow, next week. who knows. the choice is hers. ]
no subject
she'll come find him tomorrow.]