[ it's all he says, but a few minutes later there is a knock on the door to let her know that he's coming in before he uses a key to open it. he closes the door tentatively, lock softly clicking into place before he stops there to get a look at her and make sure there's nothing outstandingly wrong they need to fix first. ]
[nico gets to be the first person that she's been out from under the bed for! mostly because she crawled out to open the blinds. the city is clearly visible.
she's sitting on the bed, and she's still in her stupid bloody pink sweater with the ripped sleeve, and she's a little gross because she made the shittiest effort in the world to wipe her face clean, but she's... okay. she's okay as she can be.]
... Do you think the others are mad because I felt bad for him? [she asks, when he walks in.]
[ nimona could have stayed under the bed and he'd just crawl under there again, but he appreciates the effort. he also, unfortunately, visibly relaxes upon seeing that the blinds are open. okay. that's one thing taken care of.
he's giving her a once-over for any specific injuries, but he does turn to head for the bathroom to grab a clean and wet washcloth. realistically nimona is fine. she's capable of taking care of herself. he doesn't have to baby her especially when she's technically older than he is. but he's aware that sometimes you just need a nudge for even the simplest of things.
so anyway he comes back with that and he's holding the cloth in his hand as he comes to join her on the bed. he's not making any moves to hang it over or clean her face himself, but the option's there. ]
No. I think everyone has their own opinion of him that won't be changed anytime soon, but I don't think they'd be mad that you had your own. Why?
[no, honestly, it's nice. sometimes you are really old and really tired and you appreciate someone making the effort to take care of you when you can't or won't yourself.
she watches him make his way back over, and looks at the cloth.]
No reason. [she'd just die if the jailbreakers were mad at her but it's fine, they're not!]
Uh huh. [ dry. he knows why!! because he has felt the same so many times about people he's grown to like, worrying that revealing how he really feels will drive them all away. he's really out here just assuming that a lot of things he's felt are things nimona also feels and one day those assumptions may blow up in his face.
he doesn't call her on it, but he does hold up the cloth. ]
Give me your face. It's probably easier for me to do it when you can't actually see it, and it's gonna be harder to clean off the more the blood dries. [ address that first. and then he'll continue. ]
[you say this but he hits the nail on the head so frequently that it'll be really surprising if he ever doesn't relate entirely to whatever it is she's feeling at any time. all that to say is yes. she wouldn't be surprised if people hated her or trusted her less for feeling an emotion about an adult who validated her, insanely evil or no.
she's really old, but she's still kind of teenager brained.
a little hiccup. and then she turns and looks... not quite at him, but she faces him. he can clean her face, that's fine. lifting her arms feels like a task she's too exhausted to do.]
[ misfits recognize misfits as always. the difference, he recognizes, is that he has someone who tends to both validate him and drag him (sometimes kicking and screaming) into discussions about what's bothering him and monitoring his mental health. nimona doesn't to the same extent, so he doesn't mind doing this.
he's using one hand to carefully hold her face while the other begins to work on cleaning the blood off, even if he seems to be thinking. ]
...people have a tendency to say things without really thinking about how they might sound to other people. [ is what he says first. ] I don't think anyone from our group will think it's wrong for you to feel a little bit of sympathy for Argalia. He was still your teammate, so obviously you've had a little more time to understand the places he's coming from. Everyone's really frustrated right now because of what's happened, and it probably doesn't sound fair that people are upset with him but appear less upset with Chiemi even though it's likely they both willingly acted to kill someone. People find it easier to write off Argalia because of how he portrayed himself as a villain. When a person creates a depiction of themselves they refuse to budge on, other people latch onto it because it's easier than trying to really sort through how they feel about stuff.
[ he lets that sit for a second while he works before he continues. ] Anyway...not understanding right away isn't the same as being upset with you. Give them time. It doesn't always feel like it, but most people tend to want to understand their friends as best as they can. As long as we bother letting them.
[she lets him work, eyes on the bed, listening like always.
it's so easy to write people off. to decide there's nothing good left. to not try. to see something as violent and horrible and not worth looking at ever again. and sometimes they're right, sometimes someone isn't worth trying for, but you never know unless you look.
she wonders if chiemi had been caught, if they would've been nearly as angry, but - that's different, isn't it? she probably didn't just do it because she could. nimona knows that.
she's quiet for a bit. and then:]
I like it here. [it's the best way she can express that she likes having a group of people who just accept what she is. she worries.]
... It's fine, though, he's dead, Argalia's dead. So... so nobody will think about it much after this.
[ there's a small noise of agreement, as if to say "i like it here too" because it's only been a week since they were all arrested but it kind of feels like they all got closer in varying degrees anyway. it felt like there were people they could rely on, a little.
but...there is still that. ]
I think you and I both know that isn't true. [ maybe it's not a lot of people. but there are always going to be people who think about the dead and the circumstances that led them there. ] You get that it's still fine for you to think about it after this, right? I don't think any of us expect you to get over it and move on right away.
[ it's about as good as it's going to get, so like a true heathen he just tosses the cloth elsewhere to deal later. ]
Probably not. [ he can agree to that. ] But if you need to talk about it I don't think any of them would say no either. Some of them are weirdly accepting of things.
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my head hurts real bad
[she'll just admit it. but. she won't argue if he's coming.]
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then we'll skip the park
[ it's all he says, but a few minutes later there is a knock on the door to let her know that he's coming in before he uses a key to open it. he closes the door tentatively, lock softly clicking into place before he stops there to get a look at her and make sure there's nothing outstandingly wrong they need to fix first. ]
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she's sitting on the bed, and she's still in her stupid bloody pink sweater with the ripped sleeve, and she's a little gross because she made the shittiest effort in the world to wipe her face clean, but she's... okay. she's okay as she can be.]
... Do you think the others are mad because I felt bad for him? [she asks, when he walks in.]
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he's giving her a once-over for any specific injuries, but he does turn to head for the bathroom to grab a clean and wet washcloth. realistically nimona is fine. she's capable of taking care of herself. he doesn't have to baby her especially when she's technically older than he is. but he's aware that sometimes you just need a nudge for even the simplest of things.
so anyway he comes back with that and he's holding the cloth in his hand as he comes to join her on the bed. he's not making any moves to hang it over or clean her face himself, but the option's there. ]
No. I think everyone has their own opinion of him that won't be changed anytime soon, but I don't think they'd be mad that you had your own. Why?
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she watches him make his way back over, and looks at the cloth.]
No reason. [she'd just die if the jailbreakers were mad at her but it's fine, they're not!]
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he doesn't call her on it, but he does hold up the cloth. ]
Give me your face. It's probably easier for me to do it when you can't actually see it, and it's gonna be harder to clean off the more the blood dries. [ address that first. and then he'll continue. ]
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she's really old, but she's still kind of teenager brained.
a little hiccup. and then she turns and looks... not quite at him, but she faces him. he can clean her face, that's fine. lifting her arms feels like a task she's too exhausted to do.]
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he's using one hand to carefully hold her face while the other begins to work on cleaning the blood off, even if he seems to be thinking. ]
...people have a tendency to say things without really thinking about how they might sound to other people. [ is what he says first. ] I don't think anyone from our group will think it's wrong for you to feel a little bit of sympathy for Argalia. He was still your teammate, so obviously you've had a little more time to understand the places he's coming from. Everyone's really frustrated right now because of what's happened, and it probably doesn't sound fair that people are upset with him but appear less upset with Chiemi even though it's likely they both willingly acted to kill someone. People find it easier to write off Argalia because of how he portrayed himself as a villain. When a person creates a depiction of themselves they refuse to budge on, other people latch onto it because it's easier than trying to really sort through how they feel about stuff.
[ he lets that sit for a second while he works before he continues. ] Anyway...not understanding right away isn't the same as being upset with you. Give them time. It doesn't always feel like it, but most people tend to want to understand their friends as best as they can. As long as we bother letting them.
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it's so easy to write people off. to decide there's nothing good left. to not try. to see something as violent and horrible and not worth looking at ever again. and sometimes they're right, sometimes someone isn't worth trying for, but you never know unless you look.
she wonders if chiemi had been caught, if they would've been nearly as angry, but - that's different, isn't it? she probably didn't just do it because she could. nimona knows that.
she's quiet for a bit. and then:]
I like it here. [it's the best way she can express that she likes having a group of people who just accept what she is. she worries.]
... It's fine, though, he's dead, Argalia's dead. So... so nobody will think about it much after this.
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but...there is still that. ]
I think you and I both know that isn't true. [ maybe it's not a lot of people. but there are always going to be people who think about the dead and the circumstances that led them there. ] You get that it's still fine for you to think about it after this, right? I don't think any of us expect you to get over it and move on right away.
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he's right, though, she does know that's not true. she reaches up to rub at her face a little, again. at least it's cleaner this time.]
Yeah, but none of you need to hear about it. [she mutters.]
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Probably not. [ he can agree to that. ] But if you need to talk about it I don't think any of them would say no either. Some of them are weirdly accepting of things.