[ well he's still holding her, and he's blinking softly as he looks her over carefully. ]
I won't then. But we should probably try to at least take care of some of this. [ this is so many wounds and blood and sludge? why is there sludge. ] I'll try to be careful.
[ no okay we are heading for the bathroom to de-blood and de-sludge. carrying her! at least he's strong enough for this and so onward to set her on the counter gently. ]
Um...I think so? To be honest I sort of had other priorities so I wasn't paying that much attention. But Datz seemed okay and Will would've taken care of everything.
[ whatever. let's work on the blood first since it's easy and he can make sure she isn't still bleeding. bandage her a little if she allows it, but that'll be later. for now the priority is to get her feeling a little more alive.
though...he hums a little to that. ]
What do you mean by that? [ lightly. but filled with dread. something that says "no, i never wanted this for you." ]
...would it be easier if I asked you questions and you decided what you do and don't want to talk about? [ ... ] Sometimes that's what Will does for me when I can't actually process what I've experienced.
[it's fine, she doesn't care if he does, just. she gets fidgety. it's exactly the size of a sword, that wound, like she got stabbed through the heart.]
Both. [a little shrug.] I don't know. The town was struggling. So we went to look into it. Crick helped us, I saw him getting chewed on by a lamb, and the lamb told me to protect him because it was dangerous.
[ great! just what he wanted for her!!! :unamused: ]
Sounds about right. [ from the little he's gleaned from temenos's memories. he tries to remember if he knows much about crick. ] Sorry, so the lamb that was chewing on this guy told you to then protect him because the world was dangerous? I feel as though the chewing is also dangerous.
[ this is already setting a tone and he doesn't like it. ]
...it wasn't your fault. Remember it wasn't the real Crick, even though it all feels very real. [ gently. but...oh boy. ] What else happened in the forest? How far were you able to get?
Um. [she rubs at her mouth a little.] Pretty far. But a ram showed up, and it was... it was really sick. So I had to kill it, but a bunch of shadow hands came out of nowhere and then Crick sacrificed himself for us, and...
[here she stalls a little, digging her fingers into her arm.]
[ he stops what he's doing, and slowly telegraphing his movements so she can see his hand as it reaches for hers to try and get her to stop digging her fingers into her arm. ]
Sounds like it was hard to watch. [ ...hm. ] Did you get away from the hands and out of the forest...?
[she leaves little crescents in her arm, but he can get her to stop.]
No. [...] I woke up alone.
[there's a storybook panel that drifts by - a couple. nimona walking, and walking, followed by a tawny owl with blue eyes, holding a lantern close, hugging it to her chest. the darkness getting closer, and closer, suffocating, and then - nico's voice.
[ hey. don't fucking insert him into a bad narrative. he looks immediately frustrated that she was alone and he couldn't do anything, and that's not even touching her reaction to ace and what the fuck happened in there.
he's like. not focusing on cleaning her up right now and instead he is holding her hand and his eyebrows are furrowed together. ]
...did... [ gods. he can't even convince her that he'd never say anything like that. not until he understands what happened. all he can do is be supportive and try to walk her through this. ] Where did you go then?
[the thing is, she knows that none of them would say this sort of thing to her. she knows. it just was really, really hard, when she was so alone, and cold, and tired.]
A woman offered me a deal. She said some - stupid whatever about how the light is useless and I belong in the dark, but I don't. I don't belong there either. She just wanted to use me. [there is something fundamentally wrong with her - something so entrenched that she knows it's impossible, really, for anybody on any side to want her. gloreth didn't. ballister didn't.]
And I guess I resisted it, at that point. I don't know how. The light, maybe. I found the others.
[ "that’s who you are, nico di angelo. you are a demigod made up of trauma. your very soul is one of darkness."
"accept that you prefer the darkness. you prefer suffering. you know it is true! your own children prove it! stop denying your nature!"
so anyway, hearing this kind of actively pisses him off for reasons unknown, and by unknown i mean he sees the parallels and he knows nimona's not just darkness in the same way he's not. and she's not all light either. she's nimona. and so... ]
Well, you're right. It was a bunch of stupid whatever because that's not true. You...people have both and light and darkness in them. Even the people you least expect. [ ... ] I'm proud of you for resisting. Especially when it feels like it might be easy not to, sometimes. [ weird how the light can help. ]
...were the others okay when you met up with them again?
[she resisted it, and she should be proud of herself. and maybe she is a little, that she didn't turn there, but more than anything, it just made her feel lonely. she always has to save herself. nobody ever comes for her.
she doesn't answer the first part, staring down at her hands.]
They went through the same thing, I think. We had to stop the shadows from eating Ponta. [...] And then we went to the temple. But. But all three of them had someone. People from home came to help them as ghosts.
[ "and no one came to rescue you. no one came to help you, because no one has before. no one ever cared enough to try..." ]
What were you doing at the temple? [ "could other people's ghosts help you? why. why would this stupid place make you think you were alone all over again?" ] ...were there any other ghosts waiting?
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
I won't then. But we should probably try to at least take care of some of this. [ this is so many wounds and blood and sludge? why is there sludge. ] I'll try to be careful.
no subject
Did you... did Ponta and Datz get healed? [you could ask about kogi too, nimona]
no subject
Um...I think so? To be honest I sort of had other priorities so I wasn't paying that much attention. But Datz seemed okay and Will would've taken care of everything.
no subject
Okay. [a beat.] I did that to them.
no subject
though...he hums a little to that. ]
What do you mean by that? [ lightly. but filled with dread. something that says "no, i never wanted this for you." ]
no subject
I hurt them. [she glances at him, with that little hint of pink glow at her eyes.] I lost control of my shape and I hurt them.
no subject
...do you want to talk? [ an option, even though he's pretty sure she needs to. ] I promise I'll just listen.
no subject
she's quiet for a second, and then:]
I don't... really know how to.
no subject
no subject
Okay. [that sounds good. she can probably handle that.]
no subject
Where did you guys go...?
no subject
The world Temenos came from. [she says, after a minute.] There was a village, and a forest. And we had to investigate the dark.
no subject
...the dark, or in the dark? [ he says, as if they are two different things and knowing that they actually are. ] What were you investigating for?
no subject
Both. [a little shrug.] I don't know. The town was struggling. So we went to look into it. Crick helped us, I saw him getting chewed on by a lamb, and the lamb told me to protect him because it was dangerous.
no subject
Sounds about right. [ from the little he's gleaned from temenos's memories. he tries to remember if he knows much about crick. ] Sorry, so the lamb that was chewing on this guy told you to then protect him because the world was dangerous? I feel as though the chewing is also dangerous.
no subject
Yeah. Kinda. It was a tough lamb. [...] It's okay. Crick - he's important to Temenos, so I wanted to make sure he...
[hm.]
It didn't matter. We got into the forest and he died anyway.
no subject
...it wasn't your fault. Remember it wasn't the real Crick, even though it all feels very real. [ gently. but...oh boy. ] What else happened in the forest? How far were you able to get?
no subject
Um. [she rubs at her mouth a little.] Pretty far. But a ram showed up, and it was... it was really sick. So I had to kill it, but a bunch of shadow hands came out of nowhere and then Crick sacrificed himself for us, and...
[here she stalls a little, digging her fingers into her arm.]
no subject
Sounds like it was hard to watch. [ ...hm. ] Did you get away from the hands and out of the forest...?
no subject
No. [...] I woke up alone.
[there's a storybook panel that drifts by - a couple. nimona walking, and walking, followed by a tawny owl with blue eyes, holding a lantern close, hugging it to her chest. the darkness getting closer, and closer, suffocating, and then - nico's voice.
"There's no way to rewrite her ending."
she flinches.]
no subject
he's like. not focusing on cleaning her up right now and instead he is holding her hand and his eyebrows are furrowed together. ]
...did... [ gods. he can't even convince her that he'd never say anything like that. not until he understands what happened. all he can do is be supportive and try to walk her through this. ] Where did you go then?
no subject
A woman offered me a deal. She said some - stupid whatever about how the light is useless and I belong in the dark, but I don't. I don't belong there either. She just wanted to use me. [there is something fundamentally wrong with her - something so entrenched that she knows it's impossible, really, for anybody on any side to want her. gloreth didn't. ballister didn't.]
And I guess I resisted it, at that point. I don't know how. The light, maybe. I found the others.
no subject
"accept that you prefer the darkness. you prefer suffering. you know it is true! your own children prove it! stop denying your nature!"
so anyway, hearing this kind of actively pisses him off for reasons unknown, and by unknown i mean he sees the parallels and he knows nimona's not just darkness in the same way he's not. and she's not all light either. she's nimona. and so... ]
Well, you're right. It was a bunch of stupid whatever because that's not true. You...people have both and light and darkness in them. Even the people you least expect. [ ... ] I'm proud of you for resisting. Especially when it feels like it might be easy not to, sometimes. [ weird how the light can help. ]
...were the others okay when you met up with them again?
no subject
she doesn't answer the first part, staring down at her hands.]
They went through the same thing, I think. We had to stop the shadows from eating Ponta. [...] And then we went to the temple. But. But all three of them had someone. People from home came to help them as ghosts.
no subject
What were you doing at the temple? [ "could other people's ghosts help you? why. why would this stupid place make you think you were alone all over again?" ] ...were there any other ghosts waiting?
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)