As long as it's of use and it's something I can control, then yeah. I can use it when we need to. [ ... ] Phoenix offered to help me train and I may still ask for their help so I'm not so scared of using them.
[ which is. the crux of the issue. ace can know that too. ]
That's part of it. [ ... ] It's dumb, I don't know. Will knows and he seems to think it isn't stupid to avoid using them just because of how I feel about them but knowing what we know now it makes sense to get better with our abilities in case we have to fight back.
[ he's still staring at the halloween store. shame the demon chirrups inquisitively as if sensing the shift in mood. ]
Electrokinesis isn't something I've ever used, but I've seen exactly what a person can be capable of when they're in full control of it. [ ...he seems to pause, debating what else to say. maybe it doesn't matter. it's not like ace needs to know, but at the same time. ] It was an ability granted to a friend of mine.
I dunno. Will's a pretty smart guy, so he's probably right there.
[ ace looks at shame the demon at the sound and resists the urge to pet. he is god's bravest soldier. and also he's busy looking at nico with a furrowed eyebrow as he listens, sticking his hands in his pockets after it ]
Yeah? Did they have full control of it, then? [ which is a roundabout way to ask what happened while giving nico an out if he wants it ]
[ there's a noise of agreement because yeah. will knows what he's talking about and will's very aware of nico's still hit-or-miss mental health half the time which is why he doesn't verbally address it. ace is god's bravest soldier but he could pet. shame is right there. he should pet actually someday so you can get my meta about what that feels like. ]
He trained for a long time just like the rest of us. Electrokinesis was only one of the things he could do though. He had control over the wind and the sky, too. He could create a perfect storm if he wanted to. They were powers he got from his father, just like I got all of mine. But I've fought with him in battles before. He knew exactly what he was doing.
[ this may or may not have been true, but he very firmly believes that at the moment. ]
[ me realizing nico could introduce mental health to another one of my characters and loudly going no. he WILL pet shame someday tho. for now he nods along and notes the, uh, kind of telling past tense thing. hm.
also ew father mention. ]
Sounds like he must have been pretty tough. [ ... ] So what went wrong?
[ stop don't ew about fathers i mean actually yes that is fair. anyway. ]
One of the strongest, yeah. [ so yeah. what went wrong... ] Um. He sacrificed himself a few months ago to save a few of our friends, including Will's father. I don't...exactly know all of the details of how it happened. I haven't asked everything and I wasn't there. But I felt it when it happened, and when Apollo and Meg came back to camp not long after that they confirmed it was true.
[ it's part of it, but he's not about to tell ace the other part right now because this is already more than he's actually explained to people who aren't will. ]
Yeah. [ both to "that's why" and "it can't be easy." he's also reaching up to pet shame himself suddenly, slowly. ] ...Jason was the first person I really felt like was a friend. I didn't know him for that long, but it was still enough to know he would've done anything for me. And I couldn't even be there to help and try to save him in the end. So coming here and getting one of his powers instead of mine just...
[ it was kind of brutal to realize that, actually. ]
... A friend of mine got killed recently too. [ he keeps it vague because this isn't about him, he's just saying he can relate ] I don't know what I would've done if I'd ended up with his skills. Probably never use them at all, to be honest.
[ there's a brief noise of sympathy to that because. well. people die, but it's still hard when they're close to you. he is none the wiser. ]
...I know I have to use them eventually if we're going to make things work. And I know Jason would probably want me to do what I can to help. But all of it feels wrong right now.
[ there's also the extremely raw memory of seeing his mother again very recently and remembering how he lost her in the first place, so it's been one conflict after another. ]
He'd want you to help, sure. But I doubt he'd want you to torture yourself about it, too. [ if he was his friend. ] You don't have to be good for it right away. Maybe... try to think of it like he's the one helping you out here instead? Might help make it feel less... raw.
...no, I don't think he would have either. [ there's a faint huff of amusement, even if it's a sad little thing. ] Even when I tried really hard to push him away, too, all he ever wanted for me was to make me realize I had somewhere I belonged and that I didn't have to be alone. [ he shakes his head a little, letting a finger trace over one of shame's ears. ] At one point in time, Jason was the person who knew more about me than anybody in the world. I know exactly what he'd say about this.
[ "it's your call. i can only tell you people would be there to back you up."
stupid, correct idiot. ]
That's a thought though. Thinking of it that way. Since I can't talk to him myself, I can at least try to think of it like he's training me instead.
[ this is hilariously familiar and ace feels a bit of a pang but ignores it. ]
I doubt they meant it that way when they gave you that power, but it's sort of like he's still with you now. You can carry on his will, at least. [ there's a pause ] Pun not intended.
[ get out of here with that icon. he just nods though because yeah. jason was the best. ]
I have no doubt they meant it more as a reminder of certain things rather than something to try and help me, yes. But there's no harm in changing what it might mean. [ it sort of is obvious he straight up did not think about reframing his circumstances and he's just used to suffering. he kind of smiles at the pun though. ]
I can try to do something good. I think I'm okay with that.
Demons, huh. [ there's nothing wry there. hmmm. holds out his hand for shame to sniff???? does it work like a regular pet he doesn't know ] Does that mean you've got more of these back home?
Yeah. [ shame blinks white, pupiless eyes at ace and chirrups curiously as it shuffles closer. it doesn't necessarily sniff, but it does examine him and seems to vibe contently. ] There's at least another five or so. They could have gone anywhere and they decided to come with me and Will.
Maybe they just liked the attention? [ which, speaking of, he's tentatively moving his hand over to sort of pet shame, slow to make sure not to spook it. ] It seems pretty attached to you and all.
Well. I think more than that they also wanted to escape the situation they were in after I freed them. I couldn't leave them behind when it was obvious they wanted to be saved. [ ace can pet shame, and it feels sort of like he's petting smoke. it's not quite a solid form even though it looks pretty solid on nico's shoulder, but it's smooth and wispy. ]
Lucky for it, I'm a little attached now, too. We're learning to live with each other like this.
no subject
It's not like you need to be the best at them or anything. I'm just happy you were able to use them when we needed it.
[ even if it like. didn't work out overall. ]
no subject
As long as it's of use and it's something I can control, then yeah. I can use it when we need to. [ ... ] Phoenix offered to help me train and I may still ask for their help so I'm not so scared of using them.
[ which is. the crux of the issue. ace can know that too. ]
no subject
'Cause you don't know the full extent of what they can do and how to control them compared to your regular ones? [ he's guessing. ]
no subject
[ he's still staring at the halloween store. shame the demon chirrups inquisitively as if sensing the shift in mood. ]
Electrokinesis isn't something I've ever used, but I've seen exactly what a person can be capable of when they're in full control of it. [ ...he seems to pause, debating what else to say. maybe it doesn't matter. it's not like ace needs to know, but at the same time. ] It was an ability granted to a friend of mine.
[ that's a start. ]
no subject
[ ace looks at shame the demon at the sound and resists the urge to pet. he is god's bravest soldier. and also he's busy looking at nico with a furrowed eyebrow as he listens, sticking his hands in his pockets after it ]
Yeah? Did they have full control of it, then? [ which is a roundabout way to ask what happened while giving nico an out if he wants it ]
no subject
He trained for a long time just like the rest of us. Electrokinesis was only one of the things he could do though. He had control over the wind and the sky, too. He could create a perfect storm if he wanted to. They were powers he got from his father, just like I got all of mine. But I've fought with him in battles before. He knew exactly what he was doing.
[ this may or may not have been true, but he very firmly believes that at the moment. ]
no subject
also ew father mention. ]
Sounds like he must have been pretty tough. [ ... ] So what went wrong?
no subject
One of the strongest, yeah. [ so yeah. what went wrong... ] Um. He sacrificed himself a few months ago to save a few of our friends, including Will's father. I don't...exactly know all of the details of how it happened. I haven't asked everything and I wasn't there. But I felt it when it happened, and when Apollo and Meg came back to camp not long after that they confirmed it was true.
no subject
... That's why you don't want to use it. [ that makes sense, actually. ] It can't be easy being reminded of him like that.
no subject
Yeah. [ both to "that's why" and "it can't be easy." he's also reaching up to pet shame himself suddenly, slowly. ] ...Jason was the first person I really felt like was a friend. I didn't know him for that long, but it was still enough to know he would've done anything for me. And I couldn't even be there to help and try to save him in the end. So coming here and getting one of his powers instead of mine just...
[ it was kind of brutal to realize that, actually. ]
no subject
no subject
...I know I have to use them eventually if we're going to make things work. And I know Jason would probably want me to do what I can to help. But all of it feels wrong right now.
[ there's also the extremely raw memory of seeing his mother again very recently and remembering how he lost her in the first place, so it's been one conflict after another. ]
no subject
He'd want you to help, sure. But I doubt he'd want you to torture yourself about it, too. [ if he was his friend. ] You don't have to be good for it right away. Maybe... try to think of it like he's the one helping you out here instead? Might help make it feel less... raw.
no subject
...no, I don't think he would have either. [ there's a faint huff of amusement, even if it's a sad little thing. ] Even when I tried really hard to push him away, too, all he ever wanted for me was to make me realize I had somewhere I belonged and that I didn't have to be alone. [ he shakes his head a little, letting a finger trace over one of shame's ears. ] At one point in time, Jason was the person who knew more about me than anybody in the world. I know exactly what he'd say about this.
[ "it's your call. i can only tell you people would be there to back you up."
stupid, correct idiot. ]
That's a thought though. Thinking of it that way. Since I can't talk to him myself, I can at least try to think of it like he's training me instead.
no subject
[ this is hilariously familiar and ace feels a bit of a pang but ignores it. ]
I doubt they meant it that way when they gave you that power, but it's sort of like he's still with you now. You can carry on his will, at least. [ there's a pause ] Pun not intended.
[ different non capital will ]
no subject
I have no doubt they meant it more as a reminder of certain things rather than something to try and help me, yes. But there's no harm in changing what it might mean. [ it sort of is obvious he straight up did not think about reframing his circumstances and he's just used to suffering. he kind of smiles at the pun though. ]
I can try to do something good. I think I'm okay with that.
no subject
Glad to hear it. No matter how you get it, how you use this kind of power is always up to you.
[ you choose what to make of it etc ]
no subject
I did say something similar to the cocoa puffs before they came home with me. Seems hypocritical of me not to listen to that same advice.
no subject
The cocoa puffs?
no subject
Cocoa Puff. They're called cacodemons, but it's not really a great name for them so we've been calling them Cocoa Puffs.
no subject
no subject
no subject
no subject
Lucky for it, I'm a little attached now, too. We're learning to live with each other like this.
no subject
I had something similar happen once, but mine was just a lynx. [ "just" ] How'd these little guys get trapped anywhere?
[ they're smoke... smoke can go through walls... ]
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)